Thursday, October 1, 2009
As of 8 minutes ago (current time as I blog 7:08) I have been married 26 years. Why am I not out celebrating...husband is sick..hope it's not flu. I did go by Green Life in Asheville and pick up a few ingredients to make a delicious dinner tomorrow night. I know we should go out,but I like to cook and plus one kid still in college we are still kind of on a tight budget - but the point - I like to cook or we'd go out.
Wow 26 years ago and to think I nearly married someone else - yep came within six weeks of marrying some else. Invitations ready to go, napkins for reception with our name and wedding date on them and I decided to back out. Yes, I felt guilty...the guy was nice, handsome, funny, smart - what was the problem....me. I just couldn't close my eyes and see myself growing old with him and part of that was I was 21 and had just graduated from college and while many of my friends got married at 20 and right out of college I just couldn't. I wasn't ready. I guess I was waiting to meet Rob.
Oh there have been times within 26 years I've thought what the heck did I do?? About the 4th move and in the midst of building a house and pregnant and the house collapsed in the middle of construction I thought I could have married someone else and this wouldn't have happened! But the reality is we never know...something worse could have happened.
I jokingly tell people Rob proposed by saying, "marry me and I'll take you places"...yeah - Clarksville, VA, Forest City, NC, Clarksville (again), Southern Pines, Rutherfordton, Mooresville, Meridian, MS, Greensboro and now Flat Rock, NC. We have had some adventures. I remember when he came home and said that we had to move to Mississippi or he would be out of a job. I looked him straight in the eye and said, "I'll move to Mississippi when Hell freezes over". The next thing I knew we were on a plane to take a look at Mississippi. I wasn't going to move, but felt we owed the company the courtesy of taking a look (at their expense). We flew out in February. I asked what kind of clothes to pack and he said, "light weight". When we got to Meridian the temperature started dropping. It was getting colder there. I remember waking in the hotel room and sincerely praying, "God if you really want us to move here then please somehow let me know." We looked and looked around and the day got chillier. By the time we got on a flight home and suddenly we found ourselves in freezing rain in Meridian. I started laughing and thought, "well God you do have a sense of humor - Hell has just frozen over." I looked at Rob and said, "okay, I'll move!"
Meridian was a hard move for the family, but proved to make us stronger as a family. Ten months after moving there we moved to Greensboro where our children really grew up and we met people that made it very hard for us to move again - but move again we did. This move has been one of the hardest, but hopefully it's the last. I have said, "Rob - you can move again, but me - not until you cremate me!"
I remember 26 years ago my mom and I having the best time planning the wedding. We didn't get into those mother/daughter fights. We just enjoyed. Then my dad driving me to the church and I just wasn't ready to leave him so we drove around the church with my friend Tami (who introduced Rob and me) following us. Finally I looked at dad and said, "it's time".
I know it won't be too many years before my dear husband has to walk his own daughter down the aisle and maybe one day we'll see our son get married too. Time passes so quickly now.
The one thing I can honestly say - while Rob and I certainly have had our "white trash" moments as we jokingly say and there have been some interesting times within our marriage - I can still see myself growing old with him. Marriage isn't easy - life isn't easy - children aren't easy - but if you find the right person to go through the next 26 years and counting with then it's all worth it!
Don't you think??